My question is: What do I do if the father of my child hasn't had anything to do with the child since he was three weeks old? I have had good contact information for him but he still will not help out. I don't want him to pay child support; I just want full rights to my son. Currently, my child is in another state with his grandparents. We are trying to allow my son to go on vacation to another country with them but I cannot get him to sign the paperwork to allow it. What rights do I have and what rights does he have?
-- Kathy
A.
You need three things: (1) Most states have a statute that describes when a parent is deemed to have abandoned rights to his or her child. Many of them require a showing that the parent has had no contact with the child and has paid no support for 6-18 months. Even if that's the case with Dad, however, no court wants to bastardize a child, so (2) you'll need to have a new father standing at the ready, willing to adopt your son. Finally, you'll need (3) a seasoned adoption lawyer. Don't use a generalist here; go for the one who does several adoptions every month. Every state has at least one; keep asking around until you find out who that is and use that person. Adoption is technical, and easy to mess up.
